Posted on 2007/04/20 00:28:50 (April 2007).
[Friday 20th April]
It's quite late at night, I have just been back from yet another match of five a side football, the sport that costed me one of the the two crossed ligaments of my right knee, and endless pain to muscles, back, bones, ankles and so on...
Still I play.
You could say that I am masochistic, that I am not cut for it, that I am a wussie-wingy-curly-gay player (as the lads in Radstock loved to call me), but I still go.
Today I am really shocked at the effort that I put into playing, mostly because the teams that see my football related efforts are terribly crap, and (forgive the non modest comment), the average level is way below my standard.
In the past I would have screamed at the players getting upset for a missed passage or a bad position, now, I walk away the pitch, almost always loosing the game, sometimes even without having scored goals, and yes I still hate it, but I do not vent my rage...
The fact is that I hate loosing, I am quite bad at loosing to be honest.
This year marked my return to the football field, after the surgery, so no big deal about the result. From next season I'd love to find a better and more competitive team, to go back to those old times when a match wasn't over in the first 20 minutes...
The fact is that I need the challenge, the competition. I have tried gyms and running, but it doesn't really stick to me...
And the other thing that I hate is seeing that I AM getting old, and that some of the things that I managed to do in the past are not coming as natural as before.
On the other side "experience" is certainly increased and now I am more balanced, and sometimes I even play better than 5 or 6 years ago... :P
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